Posts In: Baseball

Baseball musings, predictions, jokes, nightmares, and foolishness.

What the Phuck is Wrong with You?

Alright Philly, it’s time we had a talk.  First of all, what’s wrong with you?  As a city?  As a society?  What the hell is your problem?  And make no mistake, you have a problem.  At a certain point, events stop being isolated incidents and start being a pattern, and Philadelphia sports fans have a [...]

Happy Jackie Robinson Day!

Today is a great day for baseball and for America, as we celebrate one of our proudest moments as a society: the day Jackie Robinson integrated baseball.  April 15th, 1947 was a landmark day for equality in America, breaking down segregation in baseball and paving the way for the civil rights movement.  Dr. Martin Luther [...]

Brian Roberts Can Eat a Pile of Dicks

Everyone has at least one guy on their fantasy team who screws them every year.  This year, my guy is Brian Roberts.  He’s been a steady second baseman for his whole career, and there was no reason to believe that would change any time soon.  But Brian Roberts had different ideas, and he’s now on [...]

Great Moments in Trash-Talking

Hi everyone, and welcome to our first installment of Great Moments in Trash Talking.  In honor of baseball finally being in full swing, pun intended, I thought I’d tell you the story of my favorite piece of trash talking in baseball’s greatest rivalry.
It was August 1, 1973 and the Yankees were playing the Red Sox.  [...]

Bleeding Kansas (City Royals fans)

I attended my first-ever opening day last week, making the drive to Kansas City up from my current abode in the Ozarks to see the Tigers take on the Royals at Kaufman Stadium in KC.
As we all know, the Royals have some…. problems. The Kansas City Star devoted their entire baseball preview section [...]

Sports Announcer Endorsed Products

With the release of Tim McCarver’s groundbreaking debut album, Songs by Dead People for the Nostalgia of Old People, several of his contemporaries are jumping on the bandwagon to shamelessly cash in on their names while they can.  Here are a few products endorsed by sports announcers:

Big Unit Hangs Up His Jock

Randy Johnson is retiring from baseball.  No longer can we tune in to watch him do his scarecrow imitation on the mound, or  see the game’s greatest mullet in action.  He leaves the game as one of the greatest pitchers of all time, and definitely the only person in the history of the world to [...]

Hey small market teams, eat sh*t and die.

The baseball off-season has been slow to develop, unless your team was already awesome.  The Yanks got Granderson; the Sawx got Lackey and Mike Cameron; the Phillies traded one ace to Seattle (Lee) for another from Toronto (Halladay); the Angels got Matsui; the Mets will probably land Jason Bay; the Cardinals are desperate to re-sign [...]

A Love Letter From A-Rod

Dearest Grace,
I received your letter several days ago, but decided to let it’s message sink in for a while before replying. I can’t tell you how much your words meant to me.  I want to let you know that I understand how you feel.  I have often wondered what would happen if we were to [...]

A Love Letter to A-Rod

Grace Dunkley-Asphall is a poet and writer who I happened to work with a few years ago.  Since we both run our own blogs, we decided to do a swap in which we would post on each other’s sites.  Here is Grace’s entry for TOF.  Stay tuned for part II when I post a rebuttal [...]