I Forgot How Much the Cubs Suck

Brace yourselves for this one , Cubs fans: The Cubs are not gonna win it this year. Whoa! I know, shocking, right? But seriously, even though the Cubs have a long tradition of winning, and addressed all of their problems this year, they are somehow going to end up being a bad team. If only Carlos Zambrano just turned out to be the ace he’s never been. Or if our offense, lacking a single superstar, or anyone playing at an all-star level, would somehow be enough to overtake the cardinals and their two Cy Young candidates and two MVP candidates. We somehow believed that we could win with two players, Soriano and Ramirez, who go to the hospital more than a syphilitic hooker. I’m headed to the game tonight, which I should be excited about, but I’m not. I was at Monday’s shit show, and last night was no morning BJ. I fully expect Ware-Silva to revert to normal Silva tonight, to the delight of many a Mets fan. And make no mistake, though there are bright spots on the horizon with some of our young players, they won’t be enough to help us amble towards respectability any time soon.