Ah, with baseball here in Chicago dead and buried (and thank god for that, really), it’s nice to have hockey back. In fact, it’s wonderful for a functional alcoholic like me, because I’m actually tempted to stay in occasionally and watch biscuit, instead of looking for love and answers at the bottom of a pint glass. Or on the bathroom floor, where I invariably end up. It’s been a fascinating week, with some real barn-burner games. The Avs are up, the Wings are down, Leafs fans are already losing their minds (did they ever have them?), and Alex Ovechkin is on pace for 132 goals and 234 points. That would be a record or something. So, let’s review, shall we?
As is my wont, I’ll keep these on a drinking theme.
Game You Couldn’t Help But Slam 13 Beers During: Fair amount of candidates for this one, with the Kings blowing a four-goal lead last night but winning anyway, the Wild storming back from 3 down in the 3rd against the Mighty Mallards, Nikolai Khabibulin gifting the Flames two points. But we have to go with Caps-Flyers last night, a 6-5 OT win for Philly. Two of the most fascinating young players in the game, Ovie and professional bad-ass Mike Richards combined for five goals. This was hair-on-fire stuff. The Caps might be must-see TV this years, as they can fill the net with anybody but might get scored upon more than a drunken sorority girl who hates her father. There’s going to be a lot of 4-3’s and 5-4’s in our nation’s capital.
A Free Beer For: Has to be Ovechkin. Three points in every game this week. Best player on the planet, and he plays the game like the weird kid in 3rd grade who kept trying to slide his hand up your ass-crack while gleefully screaming, “Credit Card!”. Usually, that kid ends up wearing a helmet and just “goes away.” Ovechkin still wears a helmet.
Making Excuses For Whiskey-Dick: This may be the only time I get to put them here this season, but it’s the Detroit Red Wings. Forever blowing leads in two virtual home games in Sweden, and neither goalie looked impressive. They’ll sort this out, they always do, but for now, we’re just going to enjoy it. They’ll probably figure it out just in time to curb-stomp by beloved Hawks tomorrow night.
Meet Your Buddies At The Bar For: Pens-Flyers tomorrow night, Caps-Wings on Saturday night.
Right, this column will expand as we go, still finding my feet. But that’s it for now…
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Can’t believe the Fly Girls are looking this good right now…
That being said, since the Caps did nothing to improve their defense, I’m pretty sure I could score on them…
As well their wives.