I haven’t ever played fantasy anything; that is unless you count the voluminous sexual fantasies that I have envisioned over the years. However, I decided this year would be different. I partook in my virgin NFL fantasy football draft last night, and my fifth round draft pick Santonio Holmes just came through big time. You’re probably saying to yourself that its only the first game of the season, and that there are countless other games that could affect the outcome, but I don’t care. It feels good to have just scored my first points as a fantasy football coach. By the way “Buck Skinner”, I’d like to take this opportunity to talk my first fantasy football shit. I’m 23.7 points up bitch! Granted you didn’t have any players who played tonight, but there’s something about competition that makes me want to antagonize somebody, call them a pussy, throw a cheap shot, or even insult their mother. It isn’t uncommon for an athlete to participate in a little shit talking from time to time, but NFL 7th round pick Ellis Lankster can’t talk shit due to a stuttering problem. He was, like um, trying to do an interview, and, like um, like um kept stuttering. Watch both videos, but make sure to watch the first one first. You will thank me later.
And now, the remix…
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